Grr

I haven't been on this thing for awhile. o_o
Well, all is well. =]

After all.

When i ,now she isn't by my side and i know she's going out it hurts my pride.
It's just like any other male in the world.
You know if this had happened to you, you wouldn't know what to do.
When i know that she's having fun, with another guy, i always say i'm done.
My time is up, for now.
Cause time is always coming back for more.
Whenever i hear her laughing, but not at my jokes.
It just makes me choke, on the breathe that i would have used for her.
I can't understand why it hurts so much.
She's over it, why can't i?
I wanna have fun this year, can i do the those things now?
You're already not talking to me, what difference would it make.
Maybe i should, i already have, i kinda didn't remember.
Ha, and everything in between.
When i watch you walk, i can't stop staring.
Just makes me wonder where you going.
Cause i wanna come too.
I hate the fact that i can't let go.
People trying to act all hard now.
They act like they care.
Bullshit.
Once they get a girl, they all caught up.
Ha, i can't get caught up, cause there isn't nobody catching me.
When i do something like that, it makes me sick.
They always liked you.
They ALL liked you.
I think it's funny, the timing that he approached you.
And you said never again.
Damn, why i see what's REALLY going on?

-Blind.

Brr bitch it's freezing.

Dude, i'm freaking sick.
I think it's cause of that shot.
Whatever, gahh.
My nose is like, freaking....idk.
Haha, but yeah.
It'sharderthanyouknow.mp3
That song is like my fucking theme song.
I hope i get my grades up.
I want that fucking car.
>___<
Can't wait till home coming.

-Blanc.

Church.

I hate when we arrive in church late.
EVERYBODY looks at us.
My keys jingle, and makes noises.
Like it's stupid.
Like i hate how EVERYBODY is ready, and mom is the only one not ready.
But when were all chilling on the couch.
And she jumps up from the stairs.
"Come on let's go guys!"
WERE ALL WAITING FOR YOU!
But then when she sees us sitting on the couch she gets mad cause we all give her sour attitudes cause were all fucking ready to go but her.
It's so fucking annoying.
Like she's a big ass hypocrite, like some other people i know.
Thanks Tita, you didn't even come down.
SO fucking gay man.

-Blancaflower

Blancaflor

It's cause you can do stuff and i can't.
You wanted to give me the necklace, and you did.
I wanted to give the shirt or whatever it is, and you won't let me.
It's just another example.
But then again i know where this is going to get directed to.
So after all, whatever.
Like i saw i'll give you your thingy, and you'll never have to hear from me again.

-Christopher.

It turns out

That weed and alcohol seems to satisfy us all.
I use to have big dreams, big things, big changes.
I need a hobby, or a life.
Or something.
HA.

-Chrizzy

After a while.

Crocodile.
See you later alligator.
When you hear this, it seems like it's so easy.
Haha, i'm not gonna talk about how up is down, black is white.
Nah, i was like that before.
But like, yeah.
Idk how to explain it.
Damn, she was right.
Not you, OR you.
Somebody else.
That's never in the picture.
WOOOOOOOOOOW.
You talk to him like nothings happen.
I wonder if that's EVER gonna happen to me.
Upsets me to hear what your doing.
Upsets me to know that your talking to HIM.
Out of all people, it's him.
Even if it's small talk.
I mean, I DON'T EVEN TALK TO HIM.
And usually, i WANT people to talk to me.
But i could care less now.
Haha, Theo is really getting annoying.
When you walk in the hallway. I get....
Damn, gotta finish this later.

-CHris.

The slightest.

I wish i could rap.
Man Drake is lucky.
>___>
"Why do i feel so alone, like everybody walking through the studio is in character like we acting out of movie roles."
It feels like that in school.
Diana, you were my movie, and all of our "friends" were just actors in our movie.
Well, to me actually.
"Life is so full, now the shit is just being lypoed."
I don't care about your life, it sucks to know i used to be in your life.
Haha, Drake transitions from fitting in to standing out.
Mine is vice versa.
I walk through the hallways i used to walk.
Pass the people i use to be cool with.
Now they just give me looks like they are much more mature than me.
Like they have never leaned on my shoulder before.
Like i haven't done anything for them.
Then you come along walking around with 5 different bitch ass niggas.
"Slip up and shoot the wrong fucking video."
"If you think i change then the slightest coulda fooled me"
"Lost some of my hottest verses down in Cabo".
You were my verses, 2-24-07 was my Cabo.
When somebody says that they actually "Feel you"
Haha, you're no where near my pain.
Nobody is.
All pain is different.
But i heard that pain is just weakness leaving your body.
It's cool though.
What if i got shot?
What if i got in a fight?
What if i got in a car accident?
What if i got jumped?
What if my parents died?
What if my dad died on duty?
What if my mom tried stopping a fight and got hit?
What if Caleb or Cheyanne gets kid-napped?
Haha, when people care about you, they'll be there.
When people actually are your "friend" they won't stop talking to you cause you stopped talkign to somebody else.
When people are "tippin on my dick" my friends laugh about it.
Yeah, i'll talk how i please, no biggy.
I wanna get my hours in, i wanna get my liscense already.
I need to drive off somewhere.
For some reason, even though i'm not that good at driving, i love doing it.
It releaves(sp) ALOT of stress.
Even though your not suppose to drive when your mad.
I can't beleive i actually did that.
It was a really retarded move.
Oh and Theo, you better stop with those fucking looks.
I don't give a fuck who your friends are, better check yo shit cuh.
I hate how bitterness in people actually get to me.
You know when you act like you don't care, and sometimes you do.
That shit gets me all the time.


-Pillow talk

You think it's funny?

Ha, my dad is like super-human or something.
He had to take 3 sleeping medicine thingys.
I remember that one story he told me when he broke his arm.
I swear my dad is like super-human or something like it.
Gah, he made breakfast this morning.
It was pretty good, hadn't had pan de sal in a long ass time.
Damn dude, i need to get over this.

-Official.

Mobile to mobile.

Not one tear, not one smile.
You think everything is okay.
It might be for you, it might be for me.
What you think is wonderful, might be wonderful.
What you think is horrible, most likely is horrible.
I don't like what happen anymore than you do.
I don't show you dis respect in school.
I don't go around school giving you dirty looks.
I don't go to school to show off how happy i am.
I go to school and try to live my life.
But when you have somebody constantly hawking you.
Constantly giving you horrible looks.
Constantly telling people to back the fuck off.
Constantly induring horrible words.
Constantly having my gaurd up.
Constantly having to hear and see horrible things.
I already know what your gonna do.
Your gonna relate to what i'm goin through.
And for some odd reason, your reasons are better than mine.
For some odd reason, it seems like your just that much better than me.
And i end up saying sorry, and i just end up feeling sorry for you.
Maybe that's how everybody else is too.
Maybe your story is just a little bit better than theirs for them to feel bad for you.
And for some reason even though i "seek for pity", your the one who always gets it.
When guys see me in the hall way it's always "so you going out with Diana still?"
I literally walk the halls alone.
It's very very very lucky to walk with somebody to class.
Cause all the people i used to walk to class with for some reason, don't walk with me no more.
MAN i need a fucking job.
Or some after school curicullar(sp) activities.
I found a MMA place.
My cousin Alex, that you think is cute.
Yeah he does that shit.
And i asked him, "After kuya RJ died, how'd you take it?"
"Idk man, it was hard, i just tried to take my mind off of it."
"Yeah but how the hell do you deal with it at night?"
"I don't Chris. I deal with it on the mat."
"Huh?"
"I'll show you, it's real fun."
Haha, so that day, we spent at the mats.
He beat the shit out of me.
I didn't tell you this cause i know you don't like me fighting.
Organized or un-organized.
But i mean, i know you don't care about what i do now.
So i found a place.
Just letting you know.
Maybe this will help me out when it isn't wrestling season.
If them people got something to say to me let them say it.
Alex taught me somethings.
I really hope somebody does have the balls to take me on.
OR at least tell me something, cause i have something to say right back.
Let me do me, mother fucker i'm me.
I'll let you do you, mother fucker your you.
It's a song.
Chill, i'm not callin you a mother fucker.
I hope i can get through it, cause i'll tell you the truth.
It hasn't hit me yet, but sitting here, looking at some things, makes me wanna get hit.
Not physically, emotionally.

-New driver.

fidelity.mp3

Dooooooooooooooooooode, i can't believe i heard that song yesterday.
Like i swear to god i was looking for that song for like 5 years.
I think it was since the 6th grade.
That's 5 years....right?
Haha, i look like fucking Matibags today.
>________>
My shirt is tight as shit, my jeans look like fucking straight legs when they are fucking boot-cuts, my shoes are fake!
I have a hole in my shirt under my right armpit and it is annoying as shit.
I think my shirt is like the only thing that is bothering me right now.
I'm really glad you lost it.
I didn't want to take it back anyway.
Lol so in my mind you still have it.
;) it helps.
But please don't come around reminding me you don't have it.
Then i'll just regret letting you lose it and not give it to me.
I know you wanted me to do you a favor, to find a nice girl.
And i will, well later on.
And my favor to you was to throw away the necklace.
And you did it, sort of.
Well thanks okay?
If it looks like i'm not fine right now, i'm probably not.
But from now on, nothings fake, i'm not afraid anymore.
You shouldn't be either.

-Wakka FLAKKA!

I'll stop.

When i have a reason to stop!
>________________<
I can't breathe out my nose man.
It's hot as shit.
I'm actually wearing a freaking beater(sp).
It feels weird cause i usually don't wear one.
I'm wearing the shirt Christa had bought me.
My thighs hurt like shit

-Lawyer

Issues.

Well hey, i'm sorry.
I wanted to talk you, i didn't know what it was about.
But i still wanted to talk to you.
Sorry i was busy.
I was playing spades.
Domo was like literally gonna kill me cause i suck at spades.
=[ i felt so bad.
And all you kept saying was okay, it's okay, chill.
I'm sorry i was a little late.
Thank you for last night.
Brings back memories.
Gahh were such hypocrites(sp)
>__________________________<

-#1

Your face will get severed.

Ey ey, what it do my duh?
Haha, it's hard to live your life when you have a chip on your shoulder.
"Well the funny thing about that Jewels is my back is located on my cock." - Seth.
I think i'll go to Boston.
I really don't like MD.
It's getting annoying.
Good thing you made that decision Diana.
Somebody had to make it.
I mean, course since i'm just the big man i am, i let you make it from me.
Ha, sarcasm.
Well, i guess it was good for you.
It felt good last night.
Being in the same room with you.
Getting a massage.
Playing a card game every now and then.
It was fun, thanks for coming out.
I guess it's over now.
My lifes gone off track.
I guess it is over.
Haha, i can't say later cause it isn't gonna be later.
I guess all i can say is goodbye.
Well Diana, thank you for everything.
Goodbye.

Sincerely,
Chris

Sbeezy.

My eye is like killing me.
I got like a little thingy on my bottom eye lid.
It freaking hurts.
I wanna stick a hot ass needle to it and pop it.
OMG I GOT MY PERMIT!
Everybody told me it was hard.
Pshhh.
I only got 2 wrong.
Hahahaha okay i almost failed it though.
Conner got me a hat.
Diana got me gauges.
>__________________<
I can't wait for tomorrow.
G-pa and G-ma coming!

-B-day boy.

Birthday.

My mom says i was born at 12 something in the morning.
That means since it's 1, i was actually born.
Wow, i've been alive for about a couple minutes.
I've been breathing for 16 whole years.
I've been living for 16 whole years.
365x18=5840
Damn, that's how many days.
How many days i've been alive.
You know life in this world, is tough.
Wouldn't it be something to die, on your birthday?
What if that happened to me?
And you didn't even get to say happy birthday to me.
I really hope you do still have love for me.
If you don't.
I GUESS it's okay.
I mean, yeah, i'll hurt.
I am now, just kind of hard to see though.
Maybe it'll help if you look, you know?
But hey, like i said though.
Guardian angels don't leave.
They just hover, to watch you.
They watch you make your mistakes.
Then literally, picks you up.
When you cry, why do you look down?
Cause of what's below you.
The ground, earth, dirt, hell.
Things that are there, but not noticed.
But when your done, crying.
I know you at least have to look up once, right?
I mean when i cry, i look up.
Cause i ask for help.
Cause you know, EVERYBODY knows, that i can't do anything myself.
So i look up, asking MY guardian angel for help.
Cause i need help.
Sorry, off topic here.
But yeah, everybodyknows.mp3
You heard it, did you comprehend it?
I know i did.
Cause that's what i'm shooting for.
Cause i know your looking for you gun, to shoot me.
Ha, thanks for everything Diana.
You showed me alot.
Since today is my birthday.
Means i'm getting older, slower, and somewhat wiser.
But i don't think i'm wise enough for anything.
I'd like to do everything for everybody, just to keep you guys happy.
Ryan, your one lucky man.
It hurts you know.
But, you can always heal.
That's what i call an opportunity.
Something that runs back, grows, regenerates.
Thanks guys for my birthday wishes.
I hope i get more.

-Birthday boy.

Business Law.

Hahaha, yeah i'm in 1A right now.
Don't you think they would have block this?
Isn't this considered social networking?
I mean, Twitter is blocked.
Hmmm, i don't want to use the filter though.
Freaking Mark with his damn cast.

Bathing apes.

My first initial reaction is to show i don't care.
But i....do.
I do care.
Most people think of revenge.
Most people think if she or he did this to you, then do it right back.
But not in all cases.
Especially in this case.
Even though i do that revnge shit, with other people.
This person isn't the same.
I could do so many things to you, and know that you won't care.
But i don't.
I know that if i do this, you'll notice me more.
Not like the way i wanted you to, but i know you'll know i'm still alive.
But no, i don't.
I don't know why.
Eveybody tells me the same things Diana.
They do, but i can't listen to them for some reason.

-Ignorant.

My time.

Enough said.

I guess the gloves are off now huh?

-Rocky

Karma.

Is a complete and total bitch.
Doesn't matter what you say.
Or how you say it.
In the end, karma kills everything.
But technically, i kill everything.
If it wasn't for me, karma wouldn't have never stuck around.
Therefore, sorry.
It might have been you in the beginning.
But it was me in the end.
I'm sorry, for everything.
Getting on your nerves, getting upset over little things, always showing off, getting you mixed up in things that you shouldn't have ever gotten mixed up in, being way to over protective, leaving you, then coming back, hurting you, hurting myself for you, always complaining, always acting scared, never talking, never stepping up to the "plate", always acting dumb, for lying, cheating, stealing your heart, manipulating you, pretending, crying for no reason, the screaming, the cussing, the hateful things i say, to continue, making you cry, making you yell, making you cuss, introducing you to a whole new world, sweeping you off your feet, and most importantly, i'm sorry for not trying.

-Christopher-Rey Dialeg Blancaflor

For a reason.

I don't know what's up with me.
Lol it's stupid how i treat my self.
But it's horrible how i treat others.
The golden rule huh Mrs. Roberts?
Ha, that's my Business Law teacher.
Do unto others what others unto you, some shit like that.
Haha i don't know man.
My back hurts.
Lol i think i'm just gonna warp myself in bubble wrap.
Okay?
I'll be safe.
No harm, no drama, no problems.

-Bubble boy.

Andhegetsthegirl.mp3

It's a pretty good song.
I like it, actually, i love it.
It's pretty cool.
I like the video that this random guy made.
"All is lost, it's the begining of the end."

-Lost.

Even though.

When i sit at home.
Not do anything, just endure all the pain.
I just think to myself.
But what do i think about?
Lol i really don't know.
Nothing funny about that though.
Sorry.

-Fuck

Yeah.

Why?
Do i keep on?
I don't have to.
I don't have to do anything.
I could stay home.
I could kill myself.
I could drink and smoke.
I could pull a Drake and Weezy.
I could do alot of things.
But i choose not to.
It's like fjskdlajfksdajfkldas.
But then it's like =]
But then it gets jfkdlsafjaskl.
fjskdla;fjklsd;jlkasjl;sdja;fldask

-Fuck

I have to prepare.

For what comes next.
Or for what happens later in the future I am not awae of.
Kind of hard talking like that.
Guess I can't do that.
Ouch.
Today was great.
I didn't like that damn noise.
The one I heard.
And the one I didn't hear.

-Dbj

Walking around.
Looking for a way.
But don't know which way to go.
I'm going to the wise with questions.
But they give me no answers.
Cause the wise are siting in pampers.
Typing on the iPhone is actually pretty easy.
Much better than the dare haha.

-blanc

I guess.

Haha Weezy know how i feel.
Ifeellikedying.mp3

-T'd off.

Whatever.

Whatever happen to everyday?
Whatever happen to always be there?
Whatever happen to i'll never hurt you?
Whatever happen to i'll never leave you?
Whatever happen to i hate one word answers?
Whatever happen to me?

-Lost.

Little old thing.

HA! *thinks back*
Have you seen those typical sad movies?
Where there is a dog and his owner.
They have the best time of their lives for a while.
But some unfortunate event happens.
Like the dog runs away, gets stolen, or something.
Or the original, the owner is forced to leave the poor dog at the park.
Just so somebody else could pick them up.
Basically leaving the poor dog there.
And that dog you used to love and play with and whatever else sits there.
Tongue out, tail wagging, and sitting down.
So happy, ready to fetch whatever you throw, ready to play tug-of-war, or anything else.
But the owner leaves the dog, without saying goodbye?
And the dog just sits there, and waits, and waits, and waits, and waits just hoping the owner would come back.
Ha, poor doggy.


-Little doggy.

Typing maniac!

Yeah, i have weird feelings about this.
It's hard isn't it?
Hearing somebody say something like that.
I guess your right.
I just gotta man up, grow some balls, and face it.

-Germs

Breakupsong.mp3

I want this forever.mp3

"This may not mean nothing to ya'll, but understand nothing was done for me."
It may seem like i really don't care.
But you can't see inside of me.
You don't have x-ray glasses.
Haha my back hurts.
I'm not jealous.
I don't mind.
Do you?

-Chargers fan.

Just do it.

Too often we are scared.
Scared of what we might not be able to do.
Scared of what people might think if we tried.
We let our fears stand in the way of our hopes.
We saw no when we want to say yes.
We sit quietly when we want to scream.

-21

Eh..Surprise? I guess I'm too late

-Diana

Uh huh.

Yeah Mhmmm.
Yes'm.
Yeah.
Sure.
Okay.
Alright.
Fasho.

-WTF!

Being scared.

Being scared, has everything to do with it.
It doesn't help one the one person who says "I'll always be here, talk to me about anything."
But then 5 minutes later, were screaming at eachother.
And besides the fact that you can't even come talk to me.
>________>
What kind of bullshit is that.
I'm never right.
I'm NEVER right.
You tell me, "Come talk to me, were so close but we don't talk."
I've come to find out that your not here for me.
You always feel as if your right.
Nobody can ever hear their very own voice.
Only the ones that are louder than theirs.
You don't know what you do when that person decides to keep his fucking mouth shut.
And something that you aren't prepared for happens.
Your so used to the intimidated opponent, you don't know what to do.
So you go back to what usually happens.
What if it doesn't work out.
Fuck it?
Right?
Your perfectly fine.
Your going to hold your ground.
Your words are short, your answers are even shorter.
Your just a shady fucking bastard that isn't up for what's next.
That's why i wanted to live with my cousins.
I finally figured out why.
You don't know me, don't try now.
When in reality were not even closer then before.
Yeah you say your fine, but "behind closed doors".
That's a whole different story.
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
As big as you are to me, your concept of things are so little.
You drag, you keep, you hold grudges.
When you say you don't MULTIPLE times.
You tell me every single fucking time that you don't do this.
You don't do that.
But you ALWAYS do it.
Man.
Boston.mp3 - Augustana.

-Dick

Double you tee eff.

Wtf?
Why is my whole body itchy?
Shit.
I feel so....weird.
Ever get that feeling like your doing something wrong, but nobody tells you?
Haha that's how i always feel now.
Living with a fucking a human military weapon, a whiny 5 foot bitch, and a fat fuck.
I want those damn glasses man.
=[ i want the REAL ones.
Not the knock-off ones that EVERYBODY has.
I left my geek glasses in Carson too!
Shit my phone just died.
I've been alright...emotionally.
Physically?
Haha yeah right cuh.
Don't trip though, i'll be fine.
I hope o____o
Spades anyone?

Bluedarling.mp3

I was a fool.
Broke every rule.
Damn.
I really need my uke.
I WANNA LEARN THIS FUCKING SONG!
I'm alright.
Life in my house has been more hectic than out in California.
;)
I have problems out in Cali?
Aww shit, i didn't know that.
At least it doesn't even feel like it.
My left nostril(sp) has been clogged up the whole fucking day.
Like fyaskfksdajksd.
I just wanna blow that shit out.
But it can't even suck in.
Woah O_O
Hahahaha.
My heart would break, if ever i~~~i~~~I~~~
Should lo~~~se you.
Blue Darling.
Fucking Sonny B. yo.
Beast as shit.
>_> Please take this pain away.
Cause i know you despise my options of that question.
>____________________<
Cutting yourself is fucked up.
I like how people with a fag in their mouth lectures me NOT to smoke.
I know right?

-hypocrite(sp)

Think about that.

Well it's 6:07 in the morning.
I've been tossing and turning.
Now knowing what to do.
I swear i haven't slept.
It's hard to sleep when you got so many things on your mind.
Grandmother is in the hospital.
Aunt just delivered a baby.
Uncle died the other day.
Other aunt is getting kicked out her own house.
Damn.
ANd on top of all that.
I got to go back home to MD tomorrow.
>_>

-FML Hoe

Damn.

My hair is gone.
My wallet is gone.
My glasses is gone.
What else is missing.
Haha remember that perfect outfit?
Yeah, that thing on my side is gone too.
Stickyface.mp3
Yeah, go ahead and mute that Diana.
My songs are dirty.
I like how i type.
I don't look at the screen.
I look outside that dusty window.
I wish i could put a smile on that pretty face.
To bad. =/
Maybe i should just take it.
Just like that one morning.
You gave me some, not all.
Cause you couldn't give your all.
At least not in public like that.
I ran off.
Like the little bitch i am.
Domo had to take care of the rest.
I didn't say one word to you.
So like i said before, i'll put on my kicks and my fitted.
And hope that's enough to keep me going.
I know i'm conceited.
But i think the word i'm looking for is infatuated.
I think that's it.
I'm not really sure it that works.
But it should.
Haha I'm listening to Smother me.
I learned how to play this on the piano.
Well, some of it.
>___>
I guess i can't do verse 1 line 12 no more huh?
Yeah your curious.
And no i'm not satisfied.
I never will be.
I hold my breathe and have that feeling that i'm all alone.
It kills me inside.
But what do i do, i show off.
I be a dick, a bastard.
A fuck up.
It sucks to know that your not there anymore.
At least how i want you to be.
No spark, no attraction.
No life.
Just barren.
Yeah, SAT word for you there huh?
How my mistakes, made your heartbreak.
I still need you here with me.
Aww shit.

-Smother me.

Nigga nice going.

Slowly, it's gone.
Just like that.
That big campfire that i loved going to.
Just a tiny candle.
I got alot to get rid of.
I guess i wasn't that master chef.
I wasn't so easy to swallow.
But that thing called pride is stuck in my throat.
I can't swallow it yet.
Just, not yet.
It was that missing ingredient huh?
So i'll put my kicks on, fitted on, and get on.
Just with a smile on my face.
Cause i'm tired of my mad dog.
Can't say fuck it, cause it's not fuckable.
Can't say sorry, cause there's no sympathy.
Can't say this, cause it's not that.
So minus well not say anything at all.
"I'll see you babe" Starstruck.mp3

Aww shit.

I swear something is wrong with my body.

A Night Off

Today, was fun.
I went to a water park, and i had fun.
Now you finally got a moment to yourself, and i know what to do with it.
My eyes hurt from all that chlorine man.
I've been waiting for so long, and now i finally got you right here.
I wanna make one thing clear, i took a night off for you.
I hate little kids who try to cut me in line.
-___________________________________________-
Kobe Bryant - Lil Wayne.

300

That little voice in my head won't stfu.

-Crazy.

Brand New.mp3

Yeah that's a song by Drake.
This summer did suck balls.
I hope that mail box is fine.
>_> i seriously have anger problems.
I don't show any anger towards my family
They find out after, just like you.
Cause i don't want to cause anymore pain to anybody.
Notice how i still haven't ran.
Let them, go right head.
Don't show any resistance.
I thought i could have it all.
But in reality i can't have shit.
Thanks.

-Christopher Rey Dialeg Blancaflor.

Come close.

I got a new song.
Listen to it.
It sounds kinda like...us?
Haha i hate how all this drama is just adding up.
=[ i wanted to have a fun summer.
But nobody trust me anymore.

The back of my hand.

Has a birthmark.
Has imprints.
Has random wrinkle marks.
Damn.
It has you on it.
Since you know it like that.
>_> Yeah i miss the way it feels.
I miss the way our lips would touch.
But your not here.
>_< Fucking military.
Still happy.
That's 4 days.
I already won the bet my lovebear number 2

-Number 1

UNO

=]
Tonight was one of the best nights i have ever had.
In a really long time.

-Actually happy.

Fuck.

Just constantly put me down.

-Lower than the ground.

Park.

WTf?
Why do i feel so alone?
Like everybody passing through the studio is in character as they acting out of movie roles. Talking bullshit as it was for you to know, but i don't have the heart to give these bitch niggas a cue to go.

-Chrizzy rogers.

Quick and painless.

Yeah.
I don't like this.
I need to get myself out of this mess.
I fucking hate this shit.
I'm trying.
But for some reason i'm just digging myself into a deeper whole.
I'm just going to literally dig a whole in the ground and live there.
No girls, no boys, nobody.
No drama, no fighting, no tears, no life.
Sounds alot better then embedding myself in accusations and thinking it's going to happen.
>_> Wtf?
It's like seriously retarded that way i'm carrying things out.
I won't say i'm sorry - NeYo.
That's the song that is on, not by choice though.
Ironic eh?
Yeah. It is.
I think it's scary how things happen.
But for some reason it just feels kind of good to let it all out.
My chest is tight, my leg is stiff.
How else am i suppose to let go of my pain.
I irritate you soooo much.
I know i do.
And don't say sometimes.
You tell everybody i'm just a dude.
I'm the "ex".
Do they need to know about that?
I can't deal with this pain i'm causing you and myself anymore.
Bye.

-TDWP

Yeah yeah yeah,

Wtf?
I don't ever understand us.
Were so wonderful.
Were so gloomy.
I'm so high right now.
I'm so high right now.

-Kid Cudi.

In to deep.

I'm already in deep.
All i'm doing is digging deeper.
My obsessions, my desires, my wants.
I'm not helping myself.
Just hurting myself.

-Dead.

Tremble.

My hands shake.
My head is light.
I can't remember anything.
I can't do anything right.
I can't keep doing this.
I don't have a real person to talk to.
People ask me why i'm so emo but i can't give them a real answer.
I don't ever want to do anything.
I just like laying in bed.
I sleep cause i'm tired.
Also cause i want to dream about my past.
And sometimes the future.
I sit alone.
I don't talk to anybody.
There is so many opportunities.
I don't take them.
I'm still stuck on my fault.
My last opportunity just slipped right through my hands.
But for some fucking reason i can't get over what i have dropped.
I want to.
It's only pain.
It's only tears.
I have an endless amount of it.
But why use it for something so little.
I'm the bitch in the relationship that i had.
I'm still the bitch in the relationship i don't have.
Which will probably never be again.
Should i stay here?
Start all over.
Just a clean slate?
Meet some new people.
Or live my life where my heart is at.
Just laying there, beating.
Your pictures, your words, your actions.
Everything effects me.
Leave me?
Talk to somebody else?
All that shit hurts.


-Paranoid.

Berry Polvoron.

Haha.
Rough hair?
Damn today sucked.
I didn't use my phone ALL day.
Lol you know why?
I lost it.
>_<
SOOoOOooOO
Maybe i did mess up.
Maybe afterwards didn't help.
Maybe things shouldn't have happened like this.
Idk. I don't ever get it.
My mom and dad don't get it.
But hey like i said maybe i messed up.

-Blanc cuhh.

Pusoy Dos.

Today.
It was alright.
My big toe is FUCKED up.
We were suppose to go watch Transformers.
But that didn't work out.
Diana AND Shy Shy's parties are tomorrow.
I hope both of my lovely ladies have wonderful times.
Sorry i can't be there my love bear.
=/

-Trapped.

Prank calls.

Haha i'm talking on the phone with Diana about prank calls.

She's not tired but she's sleeping.

And she says "Hello"

Today was a pretty good day.

I woke up like around 10 from Jeremy throwing things at me.

We had "porkbuns". Dude those things are hella good.

Then i played Need for Speed for a little.

Go dressed went to the mall and got to see Auntie Vernal.

I actually got clothes from Forever XXI.

They have pretty nice clothes. o__o

I like v-necks.

Diana is calling me metro sexual.

>__<>

She won't stop giggling.

And she doesn't make sense.

I got home and played for N4S.

My Tita Alyson got me some Captain Crunch from Starbucks.

That's the first time i've ever had it.

It taste just like Cap'n Crunch. 

Then we went out to eat at this italian place.

Saw some peoples.

Went to Malibu and the batting cages.

Whooped Gees ass in drums and guitar hero.

But he beat me in basketball once.

DUDE!

MY FUCKING CHARGER BROKE!

FML.

Wait that's the wrong blog site.

>__>

-Blancman.

Haunted Mansion.

Yeah today was alright.
Not really.
Went out to the park today.
Deep conversations.
Eh.
Yeah okay. i'm honestly trying to help but you don't beleive me. =[
I said i'm doing everything i can.
Just cause i did it before doesn't mean that's the person i am.
I've made mistakes.
You've made mistakes.
Everybody has made mistakes.
Destroy me if you please.
But i know that isn't what you want.
Like you said, you miss me, love me, and in love with me.
>_____<
Wait for you - Elliot Yammin(sp)
Those are the rest of my words.

-Filipino kid.

It's sticking mommy.

Mateo(sp)
He's my little cousin...i guess.
Shit idk he's so cute though.
He's like 3. =D
I want one.
But hey on a serious note, damn man.
I want this summe vacation to be really happy.
Or at least really chill mo.
Hey life is life.
Like i said i miss you.
I really do.
I hate how these accusations are like cornering me.
I didn't say those things.
But you don't beileve me.
=/ What else can i dooo?
I know i know i made mistakes and i regret them.
Yeah i do. But all of our anger is building up.
It's like a gun, bang bang bang bang.
The bullets are our arguments.
Then you empty the gun.
The reload time is our calm spurt.
Then the clip goes back in.
Then there we go again.
I didn't say those things to her.
I didn't i didn't i didn't.
Usually i'd say, "It's all good".
Or something like that.
But it's not.
I don't like it.
And i know i do things that you don't like.
But like i said before. Were going to have to cope.
I know you don't like it when i say those three words.
But i say it anyway.
yeah you know i'm stubborn but live with it.
You probably will destroy me.
You already did.

-Ruined

Aw Hell.

Aw hell. Just got home. We chilled at my aunts apartment ALL day.

It was actually pretty fun. We didn't do anything but play ninja.

And some COD5 and some Eye Spy game on the computer.

Yeah. It finally happened ey?

Didn't want it to. But i guess it did.

Hey, i guess i'll just have to cope.

Omg. Today was so fun.

But i come home, tired, hair a mess, phone dead, and nobody to talk to.

My tita Alyson is back home from the desert (sp).

I hope i learn. As well as she. I really miss her.

I miss those days, those times, those moments.

Ugh. Idk. I don't like this not one bit.

But i have to cope like i said.

I don't know how to handle this shit.

I'm like seriously going to try and turn my life around.

I'm going to try different things.

New things that'll make my life better. 

>__> It's gonna be hard though.

-Mr. Blancaflor

Frisco

I'm in Frisco. I'm watching Marley and Me. =] I love this movie!
But i'm scared. Damn. Wait nvm. This movie is sad.
Well i'm going out somewhere tomorrow with the family.
That's one of the reasons why i love Frisco. We always go out.
Haha i love it down here.....sometimes.
Well i'm going to sleep now.
I love you.
And you.
=]

-Topec

Cali mama!

Damn son.
I'm in cali.
I got like a major headache.
I'm here with my family.
It feels great.
The weather is great!
OMG i'm just so happy to be here right now.
I miss you=]
You know who you are.

Double you Tee Eff.

Does the shit just keep going downhill?
If it is, then i'm on the right path.
Please God, help me out.
-Begger

Hennessy.

Not just a drink.
He's my fucking dog.
And he's gone.
Everyday, right before i go to school i say bye.
But today, i was in a rush.
I didn't say goodbye to him.
No big deal...right?
I come home, and i see everybody outside.
Mom, dad, Killer, Coke.
But no Hennessy.
I didn't want to believe it.
But my dog is really fucking gone.
You don't really know what you have till it's gone huh?
I guess i don't appreciate anything.
-Bitch

Fort Minor.

Where'd you go?
I miss you so.
It seems like it's been forever.
I'm off track, i don't know how to think.
Whatever you do, i choose to react.
I don't like this, not one bit.
But i know this is the shit were going to have to deal with.
Mixed words, mixed feelings, everything is fucked up.
My mind, my soul, my heart.
I don't know what's there anymore.
When we get together we make magic.
When were apart we create toxin.
I don't want to be the scar on your pretty little face.
I don't want to be the wound that has never been treated.
I hope you can heal, but i know it's hard.
I'm sensitive, your irritated.
Little things like that don't mean shit to you.
But they mean the world to me.
I already kicked you when you were down.
I'm not looking for another fight.
It might seem like it but i'm not.
You already down, i'm here to lift you up.
I'm here to help you out, i'm not here to spit on you.
There's no reason to give you more shit than you can handle.
Please come back home.
You know where you use to live?
-Coward.

Call the weed man.

Thats Soto's favorite song. Haha he likes songs that talk about weed. For some odd reason. Not that he's a weed head or anything o__o. My foot is asleep. WTF it hurts like crazy. And last night my WHOLE left leg was like going crazy like it always does. >___<>_>_<<_<>__> Random thought. He said something about Goofy. Haha i watched the Lion King with him today. For some reason my dog has like bald spots all in the back of his neck. I think he has artheritus(sp). But idk if that's possible for doggies. Man jfklsd;jfklsd today, yesterday, day before that, and so on and so fucking fourth sucked.
-Chris.

Phase Ten.

My stomach hurts like crazy.
>_____<
Me, Domo, mom, dad, Sandra just got done playing Phase Ten.
UGH! that game is so frustrating.
I'm gonna cut my stomach open and get a new one. =]
-Blancman

Earing.

I got my ear pierced today!
And i got a new haircut!
Today was okay.
It was really chill.
I hate Domo =]

You fat fuck.

I'm sick and tired of your fat ass trying to take over everything.
If something happens that you don't like you get all pissy and shit.
You fucking fat ass mother fucker.
Your sloppy you fuck ugly ass girls.
You think you get pussy but you just fuck fat bitches. >___>
The only reason your still in my room is cause your lazy.
I hate how your such a big ass baby.
Whenever something doesn't go your way you whine like a little bitch.
The only reason you succeed in everything you do cause your a fat fuck that wants to fight.
If something doesn't go your way, you fight.
I hope you die you fat fuck.

Steez.

Dang mo. Porno, gone, just like that.
That's messed up. Over some girl.
He better have loved her.
I'd never do that to myself.
I love Porno and all but never in my life would i do that.
I'd rather have somebody else take my life than myself.
R.I.P. Stephen Pronobis.
Besides that, today was just an off day.
Porno gone, half the school is crying.
>___> Random people crying for attention.
I hate it TT__TT.
"What you crying for?"
"PORNO! OMG *continues blabbing*"
"Do you even know him?"
"I know OF him!"
"*walks away* Dumb freshman"
Like seriously. Whatever.
Mom cried today >__>
But me and Diana are okay.
Tomorrow i gotta go to school =[
Darn, can't wait till monday though.
Take me to see "Up"!
Haha my Lakers are winning!
By 10! It's the 3rd quarter.
Oh yeah thanks Gabe.
My mom is literally shaking, crying, and paranoid cause of you.
And your greedy ass parents.
Lakers lose the ship, i'm cutting my hair.
You see that Diana?
You better hope they don't lose.
-[SB_ez]

Giants.

Confusing isn't it?
I don't like it anymore than you do.
I'm sick.
Fuck off.
-Blanc.

The first of the month.

It's 1.09 in the morning.
I can't see a damn thing.
My eyes are hurting from the tears.
Your sudden anger suddenly aggravates me.
Optimistic.
That word is no where to be found.
Thanks Ryan.
I can't help what she wants to do with me.
But i can influence it, i can at least help her see what's up next.
I don't know why.
It never seems to work.
Bipolar- characterized by opposite extremes, as two conflicting political philosophies.
Dang.
That really hurts.
It does.
Not to you, to me.
To know that i still am here.
To know that i'm not in Hell.
I'm still on planet Earth.
Where things are pushed down by gravity.
Where unlike in space, you can breathe.
I wish i was in space without a space suit.
I bet you i'd live.
Just cause of all the pain i'm enduring for you.
I've hurt you, i've never healed you?
Everything is opinionated.
You might not know it yet but you'll find out.
Friends may come and go.
Wanna bet me and Bob Marley are the same?
Just ask Chris.
Not me.
The other one.
He knows.
I know.
I'm still here?
Damn, i thought i was in Hell for a second.
I'm still waiting.
-Chink.

Grats party.

Yessir. Today was a good day. Woke up around 11. Played UFC for like an hour. Went to Bolling. Devan had a party. I got hella dark dude. Lol and we played like all sports humanly possible. We played football, basketball, kickball, AND volleyabll. We were going to play badmitton(sp) but the wind was freaking going 4321432e32 miles per hour. >__> I just noticed that i don't want to play football next year. Should i? Or should i NOT? Idk. Just do it. Haha Nike on my mind homie. Man last night was umm something. But hey it'll be fine. Sooner or later, it will be....i hope >__>. Teach me how to be normal again!
-Christopher

Kings Dominion.

Hello.
Today i went to Kings Dominion.
Last night i only got 5 hours of sleep.
And i just figured out when you have a room mate that snores louder than a thunder storm, AND your nose hurts, your NOT going to sleep.
But anyway, today was good.
REALLY good.
I went on a little "date" with Diana. =]
"Pillow Talk" - Kid Cudi.
I love that song.
I'm listening to it now.
Hahaha these little kids cut in front of me and Diana on the Dominator(sp).
I cussed them out.
They got scared and they let me and Diana up front.
HAHAHA then there were a couple seats extra so we let the two kids up with us.
>___> Little Bas*****.
We kissed so many times today.
=] if i didn't change her mind, i hope she can at least stop hating me.
We argued today too.
=/ but it was cause i was cranky.
Sowee?
-Blanc

Spades Mo?

Today was actually a pretty good day.
Besides the fact that high school life gets crazier every day.
Lucky for me there's only 9 more days!
Haha but yeah.
I hate people who start rumors.
I've done it before.
But that was BEFORE so, yeah.
I hope those rumors don't get into some peoples heads.
Including mine >__>
I should start hanging out with Phol more often.
Haha i finally beat my dad in spades to day.
Suck my D*** Domo.
I beat you, you big ass baby.
Today was a good day.
Oh yeah my Lakers won. =D
I got my reward. ;]
-Clickstipha

What it do my duhh?

Ahhhh.
Today was alright.
Dude my freaking biology HSA crap was sooo boring.
I think i did pretty good.
Haha i didn't know some questions.
I finally learned the one line from "A Little Bit"!
"Oh well, tell her fall back. Caught up on some more shit tell her call back. Tell her get a man that ain't cheating on her ass with a girl that i know, yeah tell her all that, that."
Hahaha i've been like trying to learn that song all day.
Haha for some odd reason "Halo" kept playing in my head when i was testing.
Ehh i need my phone man!
OMG i'm gonna die without my phone!
-______- My freaking mom won't take it to the Verizon store.
I hated that white lady there.
She was giving me dirty looks and what not.
I wanted to slap her.
=] But i didn't.
I'm gonna go play UFC now.
<3 Blanc.

My eye itches.

My eye itches. o__o
My first entry eh?
Well i'm new to this so bare with me ya?
I'm gonna be using this alot more often.
So get ready for life stories.
If not random speaking cause i'm arguing with somebody.
Yeah. My life totally sucks right now.
But it's getting better.
I need to lose my addictions ASAP.
Maybe it'll be better in the long run.
I miss her. I really do.
I hope she takes me back.
I know i did wrong but it'll be a mistake to ponder for a lifetime.
Everything is opinionated. And your opinion actually matters.
Yes Diana, i know you don't like that.
But it's a habit or "addiction" i must get rid of.
=/ oh yeah.
My eye freaking itches.
I need to stop cussing.
I need to stop doing alot of things.
And start doing alot of things.
I'll let you how that goes.
-Blanc